So my residency (family/psych) is a total of 5 years. 5 LONG years, but I always felt like they were somewhat manageable..I mean, sure 5 years is almost like doing TWO family medicine residencies, but I do come out double boarded and I really enjoy psychiatry.
The problem is that the reality of being in a 5 year program sucks. SUCKS. Granted, various other residencies including surgery are 5 years, but I would rather cut my wrists than be in those particular residencies.
The bottom line is, if you all have read this far, is that I'm TIRED. T-I-R-E-D. I don't have much excuse to be tired, (ie, no kids, no husband (although the live-in-bf really is about the same thing), most rotations not particularily toxic) and my work hours recently haven't been that bad....
I think that being a resident is like being in suspended anmination. It's delayed gratification taken to the nth power. It's financially and emotionally stunting and I am tired of being stunted. I've thought about switching to either psychiatry or family medicine and thereby shortening my residency, in fact, the thought pops into my head every month or so.
Is this worth it, am I going to be happy, should I just call it quits. On one hand, I would be disappointing a lot of people were I to switch. On the other hand, why do I care - Life is short - I could die in a plane crash a year from now. On one hand I really really enjoy both fields, on the other hand, I could be happy doing either one. On one hand, I feel like being dual boarded would make me a great physician even were I to decide to practice only one field in the end, on the other hand, it's not like I would be a BAD doctor with only one board.
So the conclusion to this little whine session is that there's no conclusion. As of today, I am still in this joint residency plugging away. And plugging. And plugging. And plugging.
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4 comments:
Man. Three and three-quarters more years for me. Man.
(Oh, hey, we'll be done at the same time! Only you'll have an extra specialty and some more letters behind your name. So... there?)
You will be Dr. Awesome at the end, remember that.
Totally. Also: thanks for sharing. I've been feeling the end of med school "meh-ness" recently and it has been quite frustrating to hear the offline trolls say things like "you have no reason to be stressed because you don't have kids/a house to renovate/blahblahblah". It is nice to hear that people EVERYWHERE get frustrated with things during medical training.
Psych and family med will definitely make you Doctor Awesome.
The only person you really have to worry about disappointing in the end is yourself.
That said, being double boarded would be cool. And you'd actually know how to talk to patients unlike every other internist I know.
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